the evillest rickshaw driver of mumbai

He was silent when I flagged him. He nodded and shook his head pointing inwards as I gave him my location. This was evening outside Borivali station, which is as north as north Mumbai proper gets. He gunned his black and yellow chariot and we ambled along and soon reached a point where a left had to be taken in the busy thoroughfare. In front of us was another rickshaw driver, blocking our road, waiting all expectantly for a man who had just jumped over the divider and looked like he was going to get in. And while the driver waited thus, the man neared him to half an arms length and just walked past eating peanuts. My rickshawdriver saw all this with keen eyes and then all hell broke loose.

He began to laugh and then went on to laugh and laugh until he was doubling over on his steering jack. In between he turned, and his eyes full of laughter tears, he looked at me and pointing at the rickshaw upfront, he asked in unchaste Hindi, "Did you see that," and then went back to return to splits. I was getting a little worried now. I thought I had a nut on my hands. I found nothing remotely funny in it. "Ho ho he he he, you saw that. Ho ho ho he he he," he continued to gasp out through his guffaws.

The way cleared meanwhile and we started ahead but something had happened to him, my rickshaw driver. Some vent of evil had snapped. Laughing like a maniac, and driving like one too, he suddenly veered onto a bus stop where there were a bunch of people politely standing and he drove straight into them. All of them there went pell mell in all directions. At the last minute, my maniac veered again and we were back into the road's middle. "You saw that. Ho ho ho he he ho ho ho," he went. This was getting infectious and the ghost got into me too and so we both went , "Ha ha ha hah hah ahh ho ho he he ho."

He then pushed on the accelerator and deftly cut another motorcycle driver almost driving him into another scooter. "Ho Ho Hoo Hah hah hah," we went, I slapping his back now.

Now, we were at an intersection and waiting behind a Sumo for the traffic to clear. An old woman came from the left and was about to squeeze her way through from between the auto and the jeep, when my friend, noticing this, waited till the last moment, and then inched his rickshaw ahead blocking off her route. She waited, bewildered, and then slowly, all her age showing, turned back defeated to try to make a way from behind us. "You saw that," said the maniac and went, "Ho ho hoo hoo."

We went ahead and there was a cycle coming from the opposite direction and my driver went straight on to him at full speed and the cyclist flailed his arms and fell to his right. Another cyclist a little ahead, was crowded off the road and fell in a heap on the footpath. And all the while, we both went "ho ho hoo hoo ho ho ha ha. Dont ever give them room. Ho ho hoo hoo hoo"
And this continued on and on, the autorickshaw rocking left and right as we laughed all the way to my place.

We both had one final "Ho ho ha ha Hoo Hoo" before I paid him off and he disappeared from my life. I hope he had an accident on his way back.