The best chicken curry in the whole world

Since circumstances have conspired to remind me of my chicken curry and this being the season of merriment, I will do you all a favour and post the recipe for the best chicken curry in the whole damned word. After about one and half years of trial and error, I finally settled on this. It's the best there is and dont bother to thank me, for I already hear it...

STUFF YOU WILL NEED:

1. aniseed or saunf or jeera, about a teaspoon or two

2. curry leaves or kadipatta, about ten or twelves leaves

3. onions, i usually put in about five of them but that's because i like its sweet tang

4. ginger-garlic paste, about three teaspoon

5. the chicken of course, a kilo, preferably cut into small pieces

6. chicken masala powder. now this is the tough part because you need Eastern Chicken Masala or Melam Chicken Masala for it to be the best chicken curry in the world. now both brands are big names in Kerala and is available in Mumbai in quaint little shops called Malayalee shops. any Malayalee aunty will direct you there. If you dont get it tough luck. use any chicken masala powder but dont blame me if the divinity is missing.

7. tomato, i usually go overboard, and put in about four of them

8. coconut oil, maybe half a cup

9. green chillies, about eight of them

10. salt, red chilli powder, turmeric powder


HOW DO YOU DO IT:

Here's how. Put about one tablespoon of salt and a teaspoon of turmeric powder on the chicken and mix it. Now remember, you are not marinating the fellow because, this might be news for you, chicken cannot be marinated. What you are doing is removing the chicken stench and this goes away after you wash the salty dead chicken after about five minutes. Now wash it again and again, as if the chicken is being readied for its own funeral. And now keep it aside.

Now, take a vessel, a large one, pour in the oil, let it heat and then put in the aniseed and curry leaves. Dont burn them, just enough for all that nice flavour to sink in.

Now add the onions, and turn the heat on as you make these onions very transparent like Mallika Sherawat. Once that's done, it's the turn of the ginger-garlic paste. And now this heavenly smell will come floating right onto you. Enjoy it because it wont last.

Now the chicken goes in and just fry it around for sometime and it is now time to put in the chicken masala powder but before that you have to do something to it. Listen carefully because this is very important.

Mix the chicken masala with water to make it into a paste before you add it onto the waiting dead chicken. I cant tell you how important this is. I also cant tell you why it works because it works.

Now you have got a dry sort of mixture on the fire, but dont add water. Leave the heat on medium. Maybe you can add the green chillies now after slitting them. if you like it hot add a teaspoon or two of red chilli powder

The hard work is more or less done, except for the tomatoes. Now there's a theory that the tomatoes should be added right at the end, about five minutes before you conclude and that keeps the meat tender. I personally have found that it makes no difference. So you can add the tomatoes whenever you feel like.

Now cover the vessel, go watch a TV serial or read a book and come back every five minutes to stir the chicken.

After about 30 minutes or so add some salt. And then taste it to see its fine. The thing with salt is always start low and then go on increasing because if you put excess of it, then it cant be reversed unless you have a chemistry professor near you.

Add water, if you wish for more gravy and i do wish for more gravy, so i usually add it.

After about 15 more minutes more switch off flame. Eat. Remember me as you eat.